Many a man who falls in love with a dimple make the mistake of marrying the whole girl

If you have been following this blog (in a not so stalking way) you know that I have been very voicing my opinion of how life is not fair for men  and leaking God cables while making this mans world.


Since the beginning of time, thats 6 billion years ago in fact, many a men have been fallen into the unsuspecting trap, which can be scientifically dubbed as the The New Marriage bride effect aka Lady Gaga Syndrome aka also known as Cleoptra Syndrome in ancient times and in the brief period of 2001 to 2004 was known as Rakhi Sawant hallucination. The Lady Gaga Syndrome says that, you see the woman all dressed up and looking gorgeous and hot in the marriage in front of all the random strangers and distant relatives who come to your marriage to hog free food. And then, once you are done with your marriage and take her on the honey moon, the first thing that the girl does is, removes the makeup and comes in front of you in true sense. Now I am not saying that the girl without makeup is not hot, but its just that, we should get what we signed up for in the first place isn't it?

Marriage is the combination of two biggest enemies in adult male life, Ladies and Government and for sentimental purposes, girls involve God in between too. 

"Oh we have married in front of God, don't mess or God will get angry," There should be a (*) on the marriage certificate, *Marriage validity subject the time-line of make up wearing time. When I suggested to the local marriage register office, they kicked me out. Damm you, government bouncers.

So to get to the bottom of this problem (and also to distant myself from the average favorite sitcoms of Indian television, like Rakhi Ka insaaf, Big Boss and Kaun Banega Carodepati)  I decided to investigate the issue (which according to my GF is how I waste time the whole day and don't pay attention to her... paah... girlfriends, right?)

It all began in the older days when the human-kind depended on the good old sun for light. Many a men fell for the beautiful damsels walking by and looking beautiful. Then one day, a man rose and he took a vow, let us double chances of seeing pretty girls... and he invented fire.

"This way," he told to the blokes, "We can see them at night too... beat that, you God... ha ha."

His teasing did not go in vain, for God had foreseen this coming and had already prepared to give his share of joke long back in advance. The female kind was not prepared for this new concept and could not cope up with this. And thus we became entitled to the single most horrible curse hitting the mankind. You choose in the light and see them in the dark and that too without makeup.

The ancient people did try to warn us in fairy tales like Cinderella. Dance all you want with her prince charming, but as the clock strikes 12, the makeup will wear off leaving you wonder why the ugly sisters are called ugly.

It is really very convenient that the makeup, making the girl beautiful, should wear off just after the commitment. Its like, they dress up pretty awesome to go on a quest and finally when they get a dude for commitment. Whoosh, off goes the awesome dresses and in comes the regular gown. Now, the girl will dress up only for going to parties or marriage. Not fair is it?

Think of it this way, what does a woman do when she goes out? She puts on make-up, but what does she do when she comes back home? She washes it off. Its a conspiracy, you see, the world should see how beautiful she is, but the person who signs the commitment bond does not have the right to see her?

Since the beginning of time many a men have fallen to the The New Marriage bride effect, it has been called by many names so far and will be called by many names for the days to come. But maybe someday, in a distant world, someone will remember that a lone idiot discovered the primary symptoms and devised a algorithm in simple English without any mathematics attached to it which helped the humanity for endless time. Till that time, I should go and watch Two and the Half Men.


Picture courtsey: My lovely friend Swatilekha who generously gifted her picture to the post (although she will kill me on reading the tag line below). Photographed by amazing Sanhita, who couldn't miss the chance of laughing out loud at the pic.

P.s. Picture is just meant for symbolic purpose and has no relation with the post.